We Are All Responsible: Let’s Stop ‘Othering’
As dreamlike as they may seem, these incidents mirrored a deeper social truth
I woke up at 4 am, startled by a series of bizarre dreams—more accurately, nightmares. The room felt cold, and I could not resume sleep despite trying. These dreams weren’t just random flickers of my subconscious—they reflected some unsettling truths about how we, as a society, often fail to recognise our collective responsibility.
Here are the four nightmares that shook me:
Incident 1: My spouse and I were at a restaurant and wanted the owner's number to complain. The three staff members present refused, dodging our request and unwilling to provide any information. I experienced how scared they were and the violence in their refusal. I felt frustrated that my rights to complain were being thwarted. I felt angry and frustrated.
Incident 2: A large dog attacked me on the road without provocation. The owner, in haste, gave me his card and fled. When I called him, I threatened legal action for the trauma caused. He did not budge. I had mixed feelings. I had stirred up a hornet’s nest, and his reactions now would be very unpleasant when it comes. I wonder if I should have left the matter alone.
Incident 3: A large commercial structure outside my home was dismantled overnight, leaving a bare site. A group arrived, claiming ownership of the demolition. I went down out of curiosity and got engaged in conversation. Soon, without my permission, they began operating out of my house without permission. The situation soon escalated, with the media and authorities getting involved, painting me as an involved participant in the chaos.
Incident 4: Two seemingly empathetic journalists engaged my unsuspecting wife in a conversation about the demolished house incident. I stumbled onto the interaction, realising they might be recording the conversation for their vested purposes.
As dreamlike as they may seem, these incidents mirrored a deeper social truth.
The Crisis of “Othering”
My nightmares reflect a reality where people dissociate themselves from responsibility—always "othering" those they blame or are in conflict with. As I processed them, these dreams reminded me of recent real-life events. For example, the tragic story of a young employee who died under alleged work pressure raises questions about whether profit is being prioritised over people. The controversy triggered debates across social media, with other corporations like a competitor and rivals reacting by forming task forces to prevent similar incidents.
This was not an isolated event. Recently, an employee of a large Indian bank died in a workplace incident, once again attributed to stress. Social media exploded with finger-pointing, intensifying the drama. Leading Politicians and public figures chimed in, which only fuelled the fire.
The conversations swirling around these events reflect our fixation on the external—the "others." But are we really that disconnected from the system that allows such tragedies to unfold?
Profit Before People: A Dangerous Precedent
A recent article, "People Before Profit or Profit Before People?” highlighted the devastating effects of prioritising profit over human well-being. When organisations prioritise financial gain over their employees' welfare, the consequences are inevitable. Yet, we, as bystanders, are complicit. We watch, comment, and criticise but fail to intervene when it truly matters.
Satya Nadella recently pointed out a worrying paradox based on Microsoft’s internal research: “85% of managers think their employees aren't working hard enough, while 85% of employees feel exhausted and overworked." This isn’t just a corporate issue; it reflects a societal mindset that values productivity over well-being.
We Are All Complicit
The nightmares and societal reflections remind me of the deep wisdom embedded in the Mahabharata (Bhishma Parvan) and other Indic texts. The primary role of leadership is the welfare of people. As leaders, we are morally and ethically responsible for those we lead. This truth is enshrined in dharma, yet it is often overlooked in the rush for profit and success.
However, the responsibility doesn’t lie solely with those in power. We, the majority, play a role in this drama. Our engagement in social media drives frenzy, our passive consumption of tragedy, and our obsession with spectacle makes us complicit in the suffering that unfolds around us. We each contribute to our world's ongoing dukkha—the collective grief and suffering.
Ending the Cycle of “Othering”
It’s time we stopped pointing fingers and recognised our shared responsibility. We cannot afford to “other” anyone—neither leaders nor the system. As much as we hold those in power accountable, we must also hold ourselves accountable. When we fail to act, engage in passive judgment, and choose to distance ourselves from the pain of others, we perpetuate a cycle of suffering.
We are all responsible for the madness that unfolds when dharma is ignored. In this era, the Kaliyuga, we must wake up to our responsibility—to each other, our collective well-being, and the humanity we often overlook.
The Lunatic is on the Grass
As Pink Floyd’s lyrics echo in my mind—“The lunatic is on the grass”—I realise that the madness we see in the world is not “out there.” It exists within each of us, and until we address it, we will continue to live in a world of nightmares. It’s time to stop “othering.” It’s time to take responsibility—for ourselves and the world we are creating.
Since Hans Selye defined stress, much research has been published on what causes stress and how to manage it. All the prevention strategies are based on Yogic methods. Lifestyle changes start with paying attention to what one eats. Balancing work and physical activity. Ayurveda recommends play. Learning how to understand one’s emotions and inner processes through introspection. Learning how to be deeply present and attentive without stress. If individuals realise that high performance and joyous living are enhanced by following the practices, they can be goal-oriented and have the capacity and stamina to work for it.
The co-authors have been advocating that creating high-performance organisations and a culture that promotes well-being are critical for an organisation that can attract and retain people.
