Those Were The Daze My Son
The other day I was sitting with my son. He’s one of those rare 27-year-olds who, for some reason feels that his dad actually knows something. Most kids I know feel that once they pass 18 there’s nothing much that they can learn f rom their parents. That’s why there’s the saying about mothers and daughters – ‘by the time you realise that your mother is right your daughter will know for sure that her mother is wrong!’
And who can blame them? Their world is a different dimension. We read papers. They don’t. We used to write a letter a week to our girlfriend, they exchange 100 texts a day. We used to butter our toast and have a cup of tea together. They eat peanut butter on toast, drink a decaf, put on their clothes, send out emails and do a concall – all at the same time.
You get the picture?
We lived at home. They live @ home!
We watch TV. They watch phones.
We were tender. They are Tinder.
We thought we were cool. They know they are chilled!
Anyway to get back to Vir. He had a question for me.
He asked me. ‘Dad, when do you know that you are ready to get married?’
Now I realised that I had to answer this question with great precision. He has been dating a stunning writer-cum-blogger girl for sometime, who had even come home and said hello to my wife and Namaste to my mother-in-law.
So I thought about it for a bit.
Then I realised the truth of it.
I said ‘Son – a man never knows when he is ready. You just take a leap.
In fact a man is never ready for any of life’s crucial events.
He doesn’t live in days. He lives in daze.
He goes off to his first day of school in a daze, tears in his eyes, tiffin in hand.
When finishing school he has no idea how to get into college.
When he does walk in dazed and confused he is ragged to tears.
He is completely dazed when a girl gives him his first kiss. When he is getting married he turns up with a befuddled look.
(My wife’s family sent me back because I arrived too early)
When his first kid is born his confusion only increases.
His wife parents the children, as he looks on from the side trying to be helpful.
Then later in life his eyes go glassy as he has a heart attack and they pump a few stents into him. With the same dazed look he eyes the pretty nurse at the ICU.
And when the time comes for him to go as God calls him he looks upwards in a dazed relieved manner.
It’s the very same look he had when he arrived dazed and confused into this world.’
I had finished my thought process.
I looked at my son. He looked at me.
Both of us had that slightly dazed look, And realised we weren’t so different after all!
